"Three Hours Later, I Woke Up Dizzy, Confused, And Nauseated": I'm Sorry, But I Just Cannot Stop Laughing At These 27 Hilarious Fails From Last Week

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Editor's Note: While we can't endorse what X has become, we can bring you the fun moments that still exist there, curated and free of the surrounding chaos.

Well, folks, I can't say I'm surprised — Monday has returned again to torment us. I've got a new plan, though: I'm going to reach out to Merriam-Webster and see if we can get a small one-letter change to its name. We'll call it: "Nonday." And then it can't exist, right? Because it's not a day? Yeah, I think it's pretty genius, too. While I wait for the dictionary itself to get back to me, at least we've got these 27 hilarious fails from last week to get us through:

1.You'll need to wait five to seven business days to confirm you aren't turned into a newt.

Tweet about accidentally drinking a "Potion" from a child's water bottle and feeling dizzy and nauseated afterward
@Ruesavatar / Via x.com

2.But there's NO CRUST to begin with!

Half-eaten sandwich crust on a table next to an open Uncrustables wrapper, with text above saying "Kids are impossible lol."
@TownsUsa / Via x.com

Related: 20 Of The Greatest, Most Wholesome Posts From The Internet This Week That You've Gotta Read Right Now If You're In Need Of A Mood-Booster

3.Well, that's one way to get revenge.

A tweet humorously describes an 11-year-old banned from screens, who is now practicing the recorder loudly
@AdeleScalia / Via x.com

4.The emphasis on the "love" put into the pesto is really making me uncomfortable.

Flyer with images of a couple titled "Try Our Pesto." They invite feedback on their pesto product, asking if it's suitable for a business
@Liv_Agar / Via x.com

5.That's enough boba for one day.

Tweet by Chris A: Someone tried boba for the first time, choked three times, and was advised by a companion to stop
@AlsikkanTV / Via x.com

6.I believe this is now savory oatmeal.

Person sitting in a studio wearing headphones, white top, tan leather shorts, and boots. Caption jokes about using cumin on oatmeal instead of cinnamon
@oliviatheehye / Jennifer Lopez / Via x.com

7.A robot telling me to calm down is only going to make things worse.

A DHL virtual assistant conversation where the AI provides an unexpected, forgiving response to a question about package delivery
@mrsballs69 / Via x.com

8.Would you like some cheese with your chili spaghetti?

A plate piled high with shredded cheese atop Skyline chili, with a person's hands and a table visible in the background
@toebruises / Via x.com

9."Goodbye, goodbye. You were bigger than the whole sky."

Tweet by user saying they often build a takeout order, see the fees, and close the app
@adultmomband / Via x.com

Related: "Now I Look Like The Scammer": 27 Hilarious Fails From Last Week That Had Me Wheezing So Hard I'm Still Trying To Find My Inhaler

10.The look on the doctor's face is not instilling confidence.

Person with a cat on their lap at a vet's office; another cat is seated on the vet's desk
@CatWorkers / Via x.com

11.Did the cran get left behind when the plane took off?

Vodka cran drink with Tito's bottle, plastic straw, and Delta napkin on an airplane tray table
@lemoncarcass / Via x.com

12.Ah, yes. The absolute icon Audrey Hepbrm.

Car with Audrey Hepburn decal reading "(at Tiffany's Breakfast)" and "Audrey Hepbrun," misspelling both her name and the movie title
@Elmo_Oxygen / Via x.com

13.And her days have been great, it seems.

A woman smiles, holding a bottle labeled "Spanky's Whiskey." The text reveals she mistakenly added it to coffee thinking it was flavored syrup
@kenzianidiot / Via x.com

14.At least a cut to the finger is how you found out.

Tweet from Alyssa joking about cutting her finger and her husband's tendency to panic in emergencies
@alyssaleann / Via x.com

Related: "My Alarm Bells Were Going Off": People Are Sharing Their Wildest "I F—ing Knew It" Moments That Prove You Should ALWAYS Trust Your Gut

15.I believe some pertinent information was withheld about 12 months ago...

A person in a suit with a striped tie appears to be on a phone call. Caption: "Mom telling me on the phone it’s the death anniversary of a cat I thought was alive."
@bigdemonenergy / C-SPAN / Via x.com

16.The most recent trauma is filling out this form.

A tweet features a humorous caption about job searching alongside a screenshot of a job application asking to describe recent trauma
@equine__dentist / Via x.com

17.I hope you brought enough crusts for both of us.

Tweet about a mother bringing crusts of bread on a train, resembling a Dickens adaptation. Image shows close-up of hands holding a bread crust
@angelinrealtime / Via x.com

18.Hey, look, I'm also dying...of thirst, that is.

Tweet suggesting not to ask a flight attendant for a drink while they perform CPR on a passenger
@ShansDaBoss / Via x.com

19.Yeah, good idea! Let me just text her.

Carolina Hurricanes tweet sharing a humorous email suggestion to collaborate with Taylor Swift, featuring the team's logo and Lenovo branding
@Canes / Via x.com

20.The final boss of the "landlord special."

Tweet by bree: Called maintenance for mold near a vent; he arrived with a paint bucket
@haareclip / Via x.com

21."Some strange cat came in and pulled all the TP off the roll. I chased them away, though, that's why they're not here."

Cat unrolling toilet paper on a bathroom floor, with a humorous caption about finding the culprit
@AndrewHilaryUS / Via x.com

Related: 22 People Who Are Already Having A Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, Really, REALLY Rough 2025

22.The true meaning of the quote, "If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine."

Humorous tweet about booking leave on a boss's birthday to thwart his plans
@GoliathLTD / Via x.com

23.Do they make a gluten-free version of this bag?

A child with a slice of bread over their arm like a handbag
@CatholicAwesome / Via x.com

24.Now we're all going to learn just how left-handed I am in about 30 seconds.

A tweet by Josh Trebach, MD, humorously recounts a conversation about being left-handed in medical school
@jtrebach / Via x.com

25.Vito Catleone.

A cat sleeps curled up on a blanket, with a playful caption about it leaving a mouse
@megannn_lynne / Via x.com

26."Do you, as a large language model, take thee to be your wedded wife?"

Text about AI-generated wedding vows, humorously suggesting people write their own instead
@WanChiTheYokai / Via x.com

27.And finally, having that gas tank inside will take you to your final destination.

Person relaxing on a couch with phone, viewing a modern kitchen where someone is cooking. Caption emphasizes partnership and discipline
@__T_touch / Via x.com

If you enjoyed these laughs, go follow the creators! And for more fails, check out our most recent posts:

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